I wasn’t really sure if I wanted to do a post for today, its 9:35 PM and I am still contemplating then I come across a tweet and I’m like “this needs to be addressed.” Cynthia Nyamai @cynthianyamai ‘Men go through so much pressure in life, so this year I decided to treat my man and let him know he can sit back cause I got this.’ I nod in agreement.
The pressure on Valentine’s Day is blown out of proportion. However, it is the men that cower from it that engross me. I wouldn’t judge you. One thing men need to realize is that women don’t expect that Kempinski suite or a trip to far-away land although if you could afford that we would be ecstatic. Ever heard “it’s the little things that matter”? Must be a woman who said that because we can attach sentiment to anything and everything. Yes. It’s the little things that you would do with a personal touch that go a long way. I bet you already know this but I will repeat it anyway, women are the easiest to please.
If you do not already treat your woman to a random date or a night out/in then I think that is when it becomes a task for you. If you work out often, you will not find a run to be such a task. The same applies here. If you still find the little things really hard to do then I think you are a problem and God bless the woman putting up with that. If the woman settles for that then, well, to each their own.
Even with the changing times, it is sort of an unwritten rule for the man to be the provider. That could be the reason women tend to let the man do all the giving while they do all the taking. That’s when you become the house-help and are expected to do all the cooking and cleaning. If this is the case it means he hardly ever thinks of taking you out. Hence, the expectation of a day out during valentines. If you do have those on the regular, the ‘stay-cation’ would definitely work for you.
I will not lie, I like a man who treats a lady with a thoughtful streak. Treats her like they actually are the best thing and they would rather be there with them than be anywhere else. Isn’t that what love is about anyway? I have an imagination I can’t tame so believe me when I say I fantasize beyond what you could ever imagine. I am just that girl. And people like me appreciate very little things, because for us, its the thought that counts.
Take some time and do something out of the ordinary. It doesn’t have to be expensive, at all. Ladies love surprises, well. Most of us do. Although, I think if you are seeing someone it is your duty to find out what your better half likes. Take the time to listen to her, not hear her rumble like Kanyari speaking in tongues but listen to what she tells you and ask engage her in the conversation. Or just Google something dammit!
There are men who purposely bring up a fight when its almost valentines and apologize on the morning of 15th. I think that is fear of thinking, fear of using your brains, its stupid, beyond despicable. If you genuinely love someone you wouldn’t pull such illiterate stunts. You can tell her you love her a little over a thousand times out of habit but if you show it, she would never doubt that. She would probably go out of her way and do extra things just for you. I saw the grocery guy buy a teddy bear and a couple of roses for the wife and that surely could be the oldest trick in the books but I could spell the love for his wife through such a simple gesture.
Ladies, its not always about the men to shower you with gifts or exchange them either. A relationship is two way as you already know. Do not be always on the receiving end otherwise you will receive a dump too. It would really mean a lot to the man if you took care of this for once. This way you set the standards and maybe, just maybe he can have a clue of what makes you happy and top that next time.
Men, we know you do not volunteer information quite easily but please try and talk to your woman when she seeks your opinion on some of these things. We will appreciate when it is not a one word answer. It comes out as arrogant when you ignore. Its a give and take. Compromise. (So that you do not have to sleep on the couch) You will be surprised what those little things can do to your relationship. Thank me later.