8 Things you need to know before getting a tattoo.

Tattoos have been one of the oldest body art and still going strong. Having to live with a deliberate (or not) decision needs all the advice one can get before imprinting something that will be with you for life. I do not have a tattoo, yet, but there are obnoxious versions of ink that make me feel sorry for the bearer.

Intricate tattoos with cryptic meaning from Blindspot, an American TV series.

Intricate tattoos with cryptic meaning from Blindspot, an American TV series.

  1. Think it through: think long and hard if that is what you want to carry for the rest of your life. As much as there are temporary tattoos and cover ups just think and don’t stop thinking until you have agreed with yourself. Never leave a party intoxicated and head to the artist. That is not a hangover that will go away after hydration. This might begin to sound like a career decision but the truth is this is much more than that.

Continue reading

Advertisements

Dear Obama

barackobamalaughing

The man of the moment and the seasons.

 

I am afraid this is not about anything political, development, war/peace or economy related, so no I won’t be philosophical. I am Continue reading

Dear Michelle

michelle-obama-the-verge3

Dear Michelle,

Or should I go with “Heeey Michelle?” A belated Happy birthday to you first of all. The 5th floor sure does look great on you. Let me get right into it. I thought being 8521 miles away from your extended reign, you would not have that much impact in my life as an individual. Until the day Continue reading

7 reasons why I hate christmas.

As days inch further from the 25th of December I sigh with relief as there will be an end to all that is Christmas. Everything from the trees, carols, obsession, irony and double standards that is tied with this day drives me up the wall. I started hating Christmas when I was very young and I have never felt the same about the holiday. Now more than ever I feel irritated whenever someone mentions anything to do with Christmas unless they are buying me a gift, of course.

Before you think how exhausting it is to be annoyed by little things, here are my seven main reasons why I hate the jolly season Christmas:

  1. Christmas Carols: Before all else, there is the music starting to play too early in November. Why do all these radio stations punish us with these songs? We do not have any affiliation with snow, mistletoes, we do not even have chimneys guys, until you start playing relatable carols especially those made by Africans then we need to stop. Although I do not care who makes those carols, as long as they stop, that will be the beginning of my sanity over this season.
  1. The birth of Jesus is not the reason: Jesus wasn’t born on 25th of December. Please show me a scripture that supports that. Yeah, I thought so. It is a pagan holiday and even churches still insist on tying the birth of Jesus to a pagan holiday set aside by Constantine trying to get rid of paganism and encourage Christianity. Whatever the need to modify the date and link it to the savior can we at least get things straight. But I do acknowledge the need of a holiday. If we had two of these long holidays that would be great.
  1. The forwarded Christmas messages: I agree that the Christmas card does not make sense but that does not mean we exhaust the share buttons by forwarding forwarded messages. First let me apologize to anyone who has ever received a forwarded message from me in the past. If you received a GIF from me this year it is because I was too annoyed to personalize anything and I just returned it so that I do not seem rude. Personalize. Make it short if you have to. If we haven’t spoken in months please forget that B.S. Thanks.
  1. Mass migration: I understand the rural urban migration for work and greener pastures and all to celebrate with the loved ones and make merry but I still don’t understand why people are always in a rush to go home or on vacation. Not everyone shares my sentiments but if you have a home in the urban area and you have not been evicted, why the fuss? The only people I could excuse are perhaps students who have to leave their hostels. The rest of us need to rethink the melee. It is unfortunate seeing tragic accidents because of a few motorists hurrying to make the most out of this. Although the bright side of all that is that the city remains empty and sane, it feels so good not to bump into people who won’t excuse themselves or apologize. And thankfully those drivers that never want to stop at the zebra crossing, please leave your sudden urgency wherever you are.
  1. Overindulgence: Food and drinks, partying I have never seen so much wastage really. Naturally I go into a food comma and become a waste when I overeat. I try and eat controlled portions but it is not easy when there is a buffet. I don’t want to be the person thinking about all the food I ignored when I am hungry. What I am saying is that it would be nice to tone the celebration down a notch, eat and drink like there’s a January at the end of the celebration.
  2. Overspending: The sale’s are irresistible starting with black Friday and the whole Christmas shopping. It is impossible to not impulse buy at least five times when you stop by the mall to get perishables. Then we are the same people always thinking how January is the longest month. We never learn. I don’t get the point of buying a new outfit for Christmas but keep going. What do I know?
  1. For those that host family dinners ,brunches or lunches probably share in this pain with me. The women spend the better part of the day in the kitchen either cooking or doing the dishes and end up exhausted. By the end of the day you smell like ingredients and curry regardless of how much you soak yourself. The only strength left is meant to at least drag yourself to bed. Which brings me to the question, what is the point of merry making at the expense of someone else’s exhaustion?

I did not steal Christmas, I am not Grinch or Blacchyna. I am just saying. Enjoy what is left of your holiday.

 

 

The space between

Shout out to all the perfectionists in the world, for this shall be our excuse to not do things because we are afraid of our work not being perfect. Isn’t it bizarre that the blessing, (will and potential) of being so good at something becomes a curse in disguise. The curse that takes us so long Continue reading

Book review: Of goats and poisoned oranges.

poisoned oranges.jpg

Most Kenyan authors I have read are very much the same, history, and more history or a very basic story about sijui poverty and independence and state of the nation and so forth. Not that it is bad to parallel a story with something realistic but some of us live for the drama, sometimes. Popcorn anyone?

Except for Ciku Kimeria. I was at an event at Goethe Instituit in 2014 where she read an excerpt of her book. I fell in love. Despite the fact that at that point I was just a lame person not willing to spend money on book, I made a mental note to grab it someday and read it.

You see, for a long time I was a cheap thrill book buyer of “Inama Bookshop”. And by this I mean those books sprawled out on the pavements in town. Yeah, I used to love those. Anything with a catchy title a fancy artsy cover, I would hog it. I was out there judging books by their covers. Until I realized what rubbish thing it is I was indulging in. A library full of books I might never read. Well, there was this particular one I started reading and I could never ever get to the end of it. Even my imagination of the setting was so gloomy and dark.

Of goats and poisoned oranges is like an extension of a very interesting blog. Something like Biko’s blog but from a woman’s perspective. Merged with a little of the drama from Ciku’s busted show, not the one that always sounds scripted, the real stuff.  The Oh my God!!! kind of story, popcorn, tea and all.

The book is about a rich woman who gets married to a poor and uneducated man. Classic love story of rich girl poor boy, except it doesn’t have a happy ending. That’s the juice of the story. I would rate it at 6 out of 10 because, I felt a little bit rushed towards the end and there are characters haphazardly introduced. Also, it is like the same story told by different people but firm different perspectives so you sort of piece the story as you go, that I am indifferent about.

The book is available on amazon and soft copies are sold on order basis. I am hoping her next book will be better and if her first book is anything to go by, then I am looking forward.

 

Taking Stock 5

 

JD7A2657777Making: a tentative schedule that I am hoping to follow without feeling frustrated and wanting to pull out my hair. I am very easily bored with routine and when I do not have any I waste a lot of time, so in as much as striking a balance is a myth I am trying to see if I can do that.

Cooking: Lots of vegetables, I am trying out clean eating lately since it is the key to healthy living. It is important as young people to deliberately lead healthy lifestyles. There’s many lifestyle diseases and we should not make it a generational habit to eat dirt and whine at how clothes don’t fit anymore.

Drinking: Warm water. I have suffered withdrawal symptoms ever since I stopped taking coffee but it is worth it. I don’t have any cravings now and I do not think the coffee kept me awake or active, it is all in the head. I am just making a conscious effort to be active and be present.

Reading: A thousand splendid suns. I have only begun but I feel like this is going to be a great read. I am doing really good trying to go back on my reading culture, a book a month doesn’t sound so bad. I have read more books this year starting April and I am hoping this becomes a habit.

Wanting: To experiment with my hair. I’m thinking color but not something outrageous given that my melanin is already fleeking. So I do not want to look like an energizer battery neither do I want something that draws attention. You get my dilemma. Braids maybe? I don’t know. Any suggestions?
Looking: For inspiration to double up my energy and hone my skills. Have you seen what self-taught people are doing? From Yego to Laolu (@laolunyc)

Playing: Acappella tunes. How calming is this music? It is a church and yoga cocktail. My sister first introduced me to this music when she was in campus. Hush is my favorite song because it is in line with my feels.
Wasting: Opportunities. Sad but true. And wondering if this will ever feel any different. Am I the only one who feels horrible whenever an opportunity passes them because you might have thought that you was never good enough to go get it?

 

Enjoying: Solitude. There’s no better way to know yourself than being by yourself and enjoying that.
Waiting: for inspiration. Somebody slap me. In as much as I have found that waiting for inspiration is utter BS it is hard embarking on a self-discipline journey.
Liking: a lot of new music. I have opened myself to new music and I am loving the new sounds that I find. I shall be sharing with you soon.
Loving: My nephew Caelan. Well, he cries like a siren but I have been loving the little person since I felt him kick in his mother’s stomach. No one carries him except for his mother and the help. Unless he is sleeping that’s why I enjoy watching him sleep like a creep. And oh boy he does not sleep longer than 20 minutes. But he is still adorable. Very much so.
Marveling: At how patient I am with people who give me bullshit every time I give them another chance to prove themselves.
Needing: To get it together and chop these time-bandits off, without rebounding and backsliding.
Smelling: Mad about you lotion from Bath and Body works which I use as hand lotion now that my hands are not the most moisturized.

Wearing: Black kicks, black jeans, yellow bodysuit and a flowered bomber jacket. Athleisure all the way. When I look good I feel even better.

Noticing: That I need to take myself seriously.
Knowing: That I will eventually get through this.
Thinking: About how easy life can be when I choose to be present and do the right things at the right time.
Feeling: determined to conquer.
Bookmarking: Books that I stopped reading because a thousand splendid suns happened. I am a book polygamist. I was in the middle of Blackass which is currently too boring because the setting in my head is typically Nigerian. I dislike typical Nigerian films. The afro-sinema ones.
Opening: Myself up to new experiences and opportunities.

Giggling: at Falz (the bahd guy) short clips on YouTube and intro to his first album. This guy has  the first Nigerian comedy I have enjoyed.

Feeling: Stoked that I have seized the day today having ticked off a couple of stuff off my list today.